Building Stronger Bonds Through Parenting Strategies for Families

By Deborah Holmen, M.Ed., NBCT, CLC

Being present with your child can help them flourish.

As a parent and educator, I’ve seen how the strongest families are built on everyday moments of connection. It’s not about perfection—it’s about being present, listening, and responding with empathy. Over the years, I’ve worked with countless families, and I know that small, intentional changes can make a big difference.

Children thrive when they feel seen and heard. In my twenty-five years as an educator, I was able to pinpoint the exact children who came from well-balanced families and those who didn't. Let me share with you why it became an easy tell.

Numerous studies have shown that children's emotional well-being is profoundly influenced by the stability and support they receive from their caregivers. The happiest children are often those who feel a deep sense of security, knowing that their caregivers are consistently present and attentive to their needs. This sense of safety fosters an environment where children can thrive, explore, and develop healthy relationships with both peers and adults.

In contrast, children who experience insecurity or instability in their home life frequently struggle to perform well in academic settings. When a child's home environment is fraught with uncertainty—whether due to inconsistent parenting, financial stress, or familial conflict—it can lead to anxiety and distraction that carry over into the classroom.

These children may find it challenging to concentrate on their studies, engage with their teachers, or participate in social interactions with their classmates. Furthermore, the emotional turmoil stemming from an insecure home life can manifest in various ways, including behavioral issues, decreased motivation, and a lack of enthusiasm for learning.

Teachers and school staff may notice that these children often withdraw from group activities or demonstrate difficulty in forming friendships, which can further exacerbate their feelings of isolation and insecurity.

Ultimately, the connection between a child's home stability and their performance in school underscores the critical role that caregivers play in shaping their children's emotional and educational outcomes. It underscores the importance of creating supportive, nurturing environments at home and in educational settings to ensure all children have the opportunity to succeed and flourish.

Daily rituals or traditions can build the values children need to thrive.

What can a parent do to set their child up for success?

Start with Presence

Set aside a few minutes each day to give your child your full attention. Ask about their day, listen without interrupting, and reflect back what you hear. These simple acts build trust and show your child they matter.

Create Predictable Routines

Routines help children feel safe. Whether it’s a bedtime story, a family dinner, or a morning check-in, these rituals anchor your child’s day and reduce anxiety. Involve your child in creating routines—they’ll feel valued and more likely to cooperate.

Celebrate Effort and Progress

Praise your child for trying, not just succeeding. “I noticed how hard you worked on that puzzle,” or “You kept going even when it was tough.” This kind of encouragement builds resilience and a growth mindset, helping children tackle challenges with confidence.

Model the Behavior You Want to See

Children learn by watching us. Show empathy, patience, and problem-solving in your daily interactions. When you make a mistake, own it and talk about how you’ll do better next time. This teaches accountability and emotional intelligence.

Keep Communication Open

Encourage questions and honest conversations. Let your child know it’s safe to share their feelings, even the tough ones. Use open-ended questions like, “What was the best part of your day?” or “How did that make you feel?” Sometimes, just listening is enough.

Practice Trauma-Informed Care

Every child has a story, and some carry invisible burdens. Respond to challenging behavior with curiosity and compassion. Ask yourself, “What might my child need right now?” instead of jumping to conclusions. This approach fosters healing and trust.

Make Time for Shared Activities

Whether it’s reading together, cooking, or playing a game, shared experiences create lasting memories and deepen your bond. Designate a regular family time where everyone participates and screens are put away.

Encourage Emotional Expression

Talk openly about feelings and show your child how to manage them. “I’m feeling a bit stressed, so I’m going to take a few deep breaths.” This model of healthy coping helps your child understand that emotions are normal and manageable.

Parenting is a journey, not a destination. These strategies aren’t about being perfect—they’re about showing up with intention and warmth. Small, consistent actions build the foundation for strong family bonds. Your presence and love are the greatest gifts you can give your child.